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Welcome to my Save My Marriage Today Newsletter Series! If you are looking for effective, powerful tips and techniques to save your marriage from the verge of divorce and rebuild the love that you both once had - even if your partner doesn't want to - then read on!
co-author of Save My Marriage Today!
Is Your Marriage Affected By Codependency?
By Andrew Rusbatch
Codependency happens when a person or their partner does not have the self-esteem in place to maintain their individual sense of identity. Their own needs are dwarfed by the needs of the object of desire. This leads to jealousy, resentment, possessiveness, and obsession and controlling manipulative behavior
Here are 5 key characteristics that people who are codependent tend to display:
- They are overly responsible for their partner, fussing and taking care of them like they children. This kind of person often accidentally desexualizes themselves by acting like a sister, brother, mother or father. Then they wonder why their partner never wants to have sex with them.
- They are extremely responsible and avoid intimacy, which is the glue that holds a relationship together by overworking or making a lot of work for themselves so that their brains are too occupied to take the time to face what is wrong in their relationships.
- They act like professional victims and martyrs by constantly setting up and describing their partners as villains.
- They may find it difficult to express kindness or affection to the opposite sex and instead constantly test them by insulting or degrading them.
- They may hate the idea of anything spontaneous because it might allow someone to steal their partner or ruin their own composure.
People who are codependent usually deny they are in a bad situation. They minimize their own feelings and spend their time taking responsibility for how others feel instead. If they do experience an emotion, especially anger or grief, they usually minimize or stuff down the feeling or pretend everything is alright.
Most codependents appear as meddling or interfering to others because they pretend to know or assume what is best for others. Devoting their lives to others, at the sacrifice of the self, is an attempt on the behalf of the codependent to raise their own self-esteem.
The more difficult the person is that they choose to "fix," the more powerful they feel.
You are probably in a codependent relationship if you find yourself resenting an individual that you believe that you constantly take care of. You may pity this individual and desire to rescue him or her. Usually you are attempting to rescue this person from another bad relationship, chemical or alcohol dependency or mental illness.
If your relationship is strewn with arguments and fighting every day or your partner seems to enjoy fighting then you need to understand that this pattern is not normal, and is not sustainable.
If you suspect you are codependent, get help for it now. Curb your tendency towards codependency or you will be making the same mistake again and again when it comes to your marriage.
There are many more key pointers to codependency in relationships, and our marriage-saving course provides these key identifiers as well as techniques to help you overcome these issues in your marriage. Make the decision to acknowledge and combat codependency in your marriage today!
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co-author of Save My Marriage Today!
About "Save My Marriage Today"
The "Save My Marriage Today" course is a comprehensive collection of marriage rebuilding tools designed to assist troubled couples in turning around the negative patterns of behavior that exist in their marriages.
We have a range of experience with a large variety of problems among the members of the Save My Marriage Today team and have managed to help many couples in crisis turnaround their patterns of negative behavior. We have a range of life-changing e-books, and also have a new e-book specifically written for couples in extreme crisis. We also offer free access to personal consultations from a member of the "Save My Marriage Today" team.
I am sure that we can help with any problem that you may have in your marriage.